Monday, October 31, 2016

2016 October Horror Challenge #99: "The Killing of Jacob Marr"

This movie sounds so familiar. I thought maybe I'd seen it before, but nope, I think it's just that so many peoplperaved about how good it was that I imprinted the titlein my mind. I do love slashers, so this one is supposed to subvert the slasher tradition and turn it on its head, if the reviews of this movie are to be believed.

The movie begins with a young boy finding a mysterious object in the woods and taking it home, with disastrous results. Years later, 5 friends go on a camping trip to the cabin where the boy used to live, and things get bloody. My question is, how come none of the friends have heard the legend of what happened in the cabin? Can't we rely on small town rumor mills to keep us safe from not knowing our neighbors' business? Plus who thinks it's a good idea to rent a cabin in Maine? Right, because Stephen King doesn't exist in this universe.

As it turns out, though failing in their duty to pass on the creepy history of the cabin, some if the locals do try to warn our characters that some workers have recently gone missing in the woods surrounding the cabin, and these geniuses decide to stay there anyway. And really, these are some of the dumbest and most annoying characters I've ever seen. Nothing happens for what feels like hours, so I'm forced to listen to these idiots say stupid shit to each other until I want to punch myself in the face.

I really wanted to like this movie. I was leery of the reviews being so positive, but I thought I'd enjoy this since I like slashers so much. There are some tense and scary moments, and there are a few good lines ("I saw something outside!" "What, like the darkness?") But it felt like the good bits were few and far between the scenes of people staring awkwardly at each other and spouting annoying dialogue. I feel like even when things start happening, they spend way too long having boring fights about it. There's some cool gore and some tense moments, but it's not worth wading through the rest of the movie to get there.

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