Tuesday, October 27, 2015

2015 October Horror Challenge #74 "Hold Your Breath"

This movie has the coolest premise ever.  A group of friends get trapped with the spirit of a killer who jumps from one body to the next, killing them one by one.  Sounds awesome, right?  I thought so, and I was so convinced by this premise that I ignored the horrible reviews the movie got, the low ratings from IMDB abd other places, and I  was still excited to watch the movie.  After all, the movies I like tend to get low ratings anyway. I've come to expect it at t his point.  So was the movie worth ignoring all the negative reviews?

The opening sequence is a mixed bag.  The acting was overwrought and kind of silly at first, but after everythong went nuts, it got better (though I'm pretty sure what happened is against st least a few laws).  Once we meet our main characters, friends on a road trip who are going without their cellphones for the weekend (great, now they won't be able to call for help when they start getting killed) they are kind of annoying.  Plus the acting is atrocious, and I tend to be forgiving of acting in indie movies.  That is no forgiveness here.  May God have mercy on your soul.

Soon, I discovered the reason for all the bad reviews.  It's not that the premise isn't cool or that the movie didn't have the budget for some really cool gore.  The acting is terrible, the music is terrible, and while the premise behind the story is a good idea, the script has no idea what to do with it, so it just flounders.  Bad.  Like "10 minute sex scene with no nudity while a song plays in the background that appears to be a theme song written about the movie" bad.

I'm serious.  It's terrible.  My cat could write a better script than this.  Car engine won't start suddenly?  Let's all go get help, then break into an old abandoned asylum and wander around for hours, because that is the definition of getting help, right?  Then let's have sex in the creepy abandoned asylum while we can clearly hear our friends screaming for help.  What a turn on.  Our friend is suddenly acting weird and violent after we've just heard a story about being possessed by evil ghosts in a graveyard?  He's probably fine.  Let's all pile into the car that mysteriously starts now and continue with our trip like nothing happened.

Nothing pisses me off more than a movie that could have been good if the crew and actors put an ounce of fucking effort into making the movie.  Come on people, this is your job here.  I have better things to do than waste my fucking time watching a movie with a great plot that's turned into a terrible movie because of your incompetence. I wish this movie could be remade with better actors and a crew who actually give a shit.  That would be a movie worth watching.

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