Tuesday, October 8, 2019

October Horror Challenge 2019 #28: "Treasure of the Amazon"



Who can resist the wild and wooley call of a horror movie about a bunch of people searching the Amazon jungle for treasure who keep getting killed by alligators and bloodthirsty tribes (and by each other, because these guys keep betraying each other like seriously,  what the fuck?) 

I waffled back and forth on whether this was a horror movie or not, but then after the tribes keep beheading people and slashing their throats, and then we see a guy eaten alive by crabs, I figured this landed squarely on the horror side of things. The acting isn't that great, but Donald Pleasance is in it, so he's not bad. None of the characters are likeable, and I have a hard time believing they'd trust each other enough to go to Walmart together, let alone take a dangerous trip into a remote Amazon jungle.

Dude, seriously, the characters in this movie need to get better friends (it can't be that difficult, because the bloodthirsty alligators in this movie would make more trustworthy companions than any of the people). Also, who knew random herds of deer often ran through the Amazon jungle? And if there are this many deer and pigs running around, why does the main character choose to catch a snake and bbq it for food? I get that he's supposed to be a rugged,  outdoorsy type of guy, but that's just ridiculous.

The women in this movie get a rough deal. They're mostly here to be eye candy, like the native woman who rides a horse around topless and lets Donald Pleasance's character treat her like crap, or the redhead who can never decide what type of accent she's trying to have, who is treated like a hussy and almost raped, then has sex with the guy who saves her, than double crosses him (seriously, these people are HORRIBLE). So the movie isn't great, but you get to see most of the horrible characters get stabbed and slashed and eaten, so it's got that going for it.

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