Saturday, October 31, 2009

Captivity (movie #82)

I really hated this movie when I first saw it. Elisha Cuthbert plays a prissy airheaded model who gets kidnapped and tortured by some evil baddie that we don't see for the first 30 minutes of the movie (he sits in shadow and monitors everything on a TV screen like Dr. Claw from "Inspector Gadget," which made the movie unintentionally hilarious for me) and then at the half hour mark it gets unbelievably stupid with "plot twists" involving the secret lives of the captors, and everything gets so stupid that after awhile I wanted to kill the director (arrogant little prick that he is). This time around, though, the movie didn't annoy me as much., I definitely liked the theatrical ending that I saw in this version better than the one on the unrated DVD.

SPOILERS WHY DO YOU CARE IF THIS STUPID MOVIE IS SPOILED FOR YOU YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO WATCH IT IF YOU'RE SMART

In the ending I saw, the woman kills the bad guys and escapes, then we see her in an interview talking about what happened to her and how perverts like her captors deserve to die, and then we see that she has become a vigilante who kills rapists and child molesters and the like. It's a really dumb twist on top of a lot of other dumb twists. In the theatrical ending I saw in this version, we just see the woman wandering off broken and looking traumatized, and the movie ends there, and that's a lot more powerful than seeing her turn into Batman. This movie still sucks, though, so you shouldn't see it unless you have absolutely nothing else to do.

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