2011 October Horror Movie Challenge Movie 45: [REC]2

Oh my God, I loved this movie. I mean seriously LOVED this movie. Like I want to go out and buy it and watch it again right now. I am SO STOKED right now, you have no idea. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, because that's how I felt about the original movie after I'd seen it, but I thought with this movie...where the hell else are they going to go with this story? I mean, the original was shocking since it built up to its surprises, and people didn't know what was going to happen once they entered that apartment building, but now the cat is out of the bag (so to speak) and people know what's going on in that apartment (or they think they do, heh heh heh) so I honestly didn't see where else the story could go from here (except downhill, and that wasn't something I wanted to see). THIS is what a horror movie should do. Prove me wrong. Surprise me and keep me interested and show me that even when I think I've seen it all, I ain't seen nothing yet.

So y'all know the story here, right? A local news crew doing a community interest piece follows some firefighters around while they do their job one night, and they answer a distress call at an apartment building where an old lady is sick, and all hell breaks loose as they wind up trapped in a building with what seems to be a virus moving through the people in the building and turning them into rabid zombie-like creatures who are REALLY pissed off for some unknown reason. The local government is all about quarantining the people in the apartment to prevent the spread of the virus, and the people are trapped and freaked out as they get picked off one by one. It's a great little movie, and this movie picks up right where that one ended, with local troops being dispatched to go into the apartment and see what happened there. All is not as it seems though, and the troops haven't been told the whole truth, and they encounter something they never expected, and I have to shut up now before I give away everything that happens (I know, you're thinking "but you DID give everything away!" Not even close. that's what I thought too, but this movie surprised me more than I could have ever expected, and you should go out and watch it now and see what I mean, ok)?

2011 October Horror Movie Challenge Movie 44: The Human Centipede: First Sequence

I don't really know what to say about this movie. It's one of those movies where the subject matter is so gross that people pitch a fit about it without even having seen it, and they build the movie up to be the most disgusting thing ever filmed, and then the fans of really disgusting movies go and see it and they think it's boring, because it doesn't live up to the hype, and then some people go and see it and come back preaching about how it's "deeply moving" and it will "affect people emotionally and they can't deny its power" and then other people counter that flowery praise by saying "no, it didn't affect me deeply, it bored the fuck out of me" and people like me sit in the middle of all this controversy and don't know what to believe.

Here's my take: I liked this movie. I liked the two girls who appear at the beginning. Sure, they're kind of twits, but so was I at 22, and it's not like they're all that much more annoying than other horror movie characters, so I don't know why so many people complained about them being annoying. They're not that bad. And then people complained that they whined a lot. Ok, when you get captured by a killer who wants to sew you ass-to-mouth with two other people and turn you into a human centipede, and he drugs you and mutilates you, then you can come to me and brag about how you never whined or cried about it. For me, I didn't find their crying all that excessive. I'd be crying too if I were in that situation. Sure, I wouldn't be in that situation because I'd never go into this creepy asshole's house in the first place, especially after his first question to me when I came to his door was "Are you alone?" but it didn't bother me that these girls cried. I also found it kind of touching when they'd hold hands and try to comfort each other even after creepy freaky guy sews them together. Sue me. I wasn't "deeply emotionally scarred" by it or anything, but I felt bad for these people in this horrible situation.

That's another point I want to address: the gore we see onscreen. It's disgusting to think about what this freak does to these people, but the movie really doesn't "show" us that much gore. We get to see the people sewn together, and picturing what that would be like for them is disturbing, but as for actual gore, I've seen far gorier films. I guess with this movie, the premise either works or it doesn't. Either you get freaked out thinking about how horrible this situation would be, and you feel bad for the characters, and that keeps you interested in the movie even when it gets ridiculous (and believe me, it DOES stretch the limits of disbelief on more than one occasion) or it gets too ridiculous for you and the movie collapses under the weight of everything that doesn't work and you wind up not liking it. I can see how that could happen, too. People complain about the two girls being stupid, but holy batfuck batman, are the COPS in this movie a couple of boneheads. Seriously, they are the ones who piss me off, making some of the dumbest moves I've ever seen characters make onscreen. By the end of the movie I wanted to jump through the screen and kill them myself.

Speaking of the ending, it's really disturbing for me. I could see how for some people it would just be over-the-top and silly, but I'd managed to like the characters even through everything that happened, so I felt bad for their situation and the ending was suitably disturbing for me because of this. Ultimately, I found enough in this movie to enjoy, and I cared about the characters, so I was glad I watched it, even if the idea behind the movie is really gross. I don't get those people who read the description of the movie, knew what it was about, then walked into a screening of their own free will and ended up walking out. I read one review where the reviewer refused to write a review (nice show of dedication to your job there, buddy) and he actually said "I read the description, so I knew what the movie was about, and then I saw what was happening onscreen and I thought 'yep, they really ARE going to show this' and I walked out." I don't get statements like that. This is a movie about a creepy weirdo doctor who's so messed up he thinks he can destroy people's lives by experimenting on human beings and mutilating them and turning them into a grotesque creature...what did you think it was going to be about? Sorry, you don't get any brownie points from me for knowing what a movie is about and then walking out because the movie shows what it says it's going to show (and like I said, the movie isn't even THAT disturbing unless you've connected enough with the characters to care what they're going through onscreen, and if you've done that much, than the movie has some skill and effectiveness to recommend it, or you wouldn't have been affected that way). Right? I mean, if you're affected enough by the movie to walk out of it, then in some ways it must have done its job. If you walk out because you're bored, that's another thing I guess, but none of the early reviews said that; they all talked about having to leave because the movie was so disgusting, and I thought "well...yeah, isn't it supposed to be that way?"

I don't know if I can recommend this movie, because a lot of people I know and respect didn't like it, but I'm used to that. People usually don't like the movies I like anyway. As far as I'm concerned, this movie was worth a watch, so horror fans who can stomach the premise of the movie should at least give it a look before they dismiss it because of all the controversy.

2011 October Horror Movie Challenge Movie 43: In Dreams

I was so aggravated after this movie ended that I decided to let it sit for awhile before I wrote my review to avoid snapping and screaming "OMG IT SUCKED" at the top of mu lungs, because the truth is, this movie DOESN'T suck...some parts of it are very well done, but they're bogged down by so much crap that it's hard to appreciate them. I finally realized today what it's like. It's like there is a good movie buried alive under a pile of shit, and it keeps trying to dig its way to the surface and every once in awhile a hand breaks free or a head pops up only to be forced back down by the weight of all the shit surrounding it.

Annette Benning gives an alternatingly good and annoyingly over-the-top performance here as a young mother who has been plagued by visions all her life, but recently she's been dreaming of a man killing children in an apple orchard, and when cvhildren really ARE disappearing in her town, that understandably scares her. Aidan Quinn is ok in his role as the not quite doting husband who is away all the time because his job takes him all over the world, but it's hard to blame him for cracking up a little when his wife goes completely apeshit halfway through the movie and she's screaming and ranting and raving and cutting herself and it's hard to know what's really happening and what's all in her head. I mean that for the audience too. I spent the better part of this movie wondering what the fuck I was seeing onscreen, and I'm still not sure. I think this movie was trying too hard to be symbolic and poetic and it slipped over the line into ridiculous territory instead. It's a shame, because there's a lot that could have been good here, and it's interesting to give the movie a watch, but don't expect it to make much coherent sense, and don't watch it with a migraine like I did, because it will just make things worse.

2011 October Horror Movie Challenge Movie 42: Don't Be Afraid of the Dark (2011)

I know I saw the original of this movie when I was a kid. I wasn't allowed to watch it, but I remember sneaking out and hiding behind the couch in my aunt and uncle's house and seeing parts of it. I don't remember it very well, but I remember enough to know I liked what I saw. I haven't gotten around to watching the original since then (I was about 6 or 7 when I first saw it) but when I got the chance to go see this remake in the cheapie theaters with a friend, I jumped at the chance.

I don't care what anyone else says, for my money, this was a good movie. It was creepy, I cared about the characters, and the acting was much better than I would have expected. Katie Holmes did a good job as the harried stepmother trying to connect with a stepdaughter who wants nothing to do with her, Guy Pearce is great as the idiot dad who is so focused on work that he doesn't realize that evil creatures in his creepy old house are focused on taking his daughter from him, and even the daughter did a good job playing her role. Kids can always be a gamble in any movie, but she managed to be annoying and rebellious while still making me care what happened to her. The creatures were creepy, too. they were exactly what would have made me terrified to look under the bed at 10 years old (and they were no picnic to see at 30, either). This isn't the pinnacle of cinematic genius or anything, but it was a lot of fun, enough to make me want to buy the DVD when it comes out.

2011 October Horror Movie Challenge Movie 41: Night of the Demons (1988)

This is one of those 80s horror flicks that I somehow managed to miss over the years, and I've always wanted to see it, so that could be part of why I was so let down when I finally did see it. Right from the beginning, ALL of the characters in this movie are complete assholes and they mock each other and act like jerks, and the first 45 minutes of this movie NOTHING really happens except we follow these jackasses around watching them treat each other like shit, and I was ready to jump through the screen and kill them all myself when something FINALLY happened and the demon action started. I guess after that it was ok, but I still didn't really like any of the characters so I got annoyed with them while they made some of the stupidest boneheaded moves I've ever seen and got picked off one by one. The movie really seemed to drag. The opening sequence and the closing sequence which feature a grouchy old man and his longsuffering wife are actually the best part of the movie, but I didn't appreciate having to sit through an hour and a half of bullshit to get there. This movie isn't as good as its reputation would lead you to believe. If I want to watch a kooky and cheesy 80s horror flick, "Return of the Living Dead" is lightyears better than this.

2011 October Horror Movie Challenge Movie 40: Wake Wood

I'm on a roll lately. Every movie I've watched has been good (knock on wood...haha, wood). This story particularly grabbed me. A mother and father are devastated when their daughter dies, and they move to a small village where the villagers have some strange customs. They learn that there is a ritual where the villagers can bring their daughter back for three days so they can see her one last time and say a proper goodbye. Nothing about this scenario sounds like a bad idea to them, so they agree, but will three days be enough time? Could there be consequences for trying to cheat death? The premise is compelling, the acting is good, and the story kept me guessing (plus the ending is just plain great). This one is highly recommended.

2011 October Horror Movie Challenge Movie 39: Dead Snow

Everybody has been telling me for a few years that this movie is good, but I haven't had a chance to check it out until now. In this case, everyone was right, this movie is pretty awesome. At first I didn't like the main characters, 6 med school students heading into the mountains for a week-long ski trip in a friend's cabin, but as the movie went on, the characters kind of grew on me and I wound up rooting for them. This is the first "nazi zombie" movie I've seen (apparently there are several) and that premise sounds kind of dubious, but I guess it works as well as any other zombie movie. A character drops by randomly on the first night in the cabin to tell the story that serves as exposition here (Nazis occupied a town during the second world war, they tortured and mistreated the townspeople, the townspeople fight back and drive the Nazis into the mountains where they froze to death, their evil still exists and can bring them back to life to munch on anyone who disturbs their slumber, that kind of thing). It's a little silly, but there's enough gore and semi-likable characters to keep me entertained.