BABIES

If you're like me and you're having a serious case of the baby rabies (it comes and goes, but there's no shot for it yet) then you'll love watching this trailer. This movie looks so adorable that I have to see it! I used to have these times when I'd want a baby, but then I could spend time with a friend's baby and that would cure me. Not anymore. Now spending time around them just makes me want one more. Baby Rabies is contagious like that. :-p

Disclaimer: If you click on any of the links or pictures below, it will give me points as a BzzAgent (I'm helping to promote this film) but I would post about it even if I weren't getting points, because it really does look like it's going to be a great movie (hey, I rant about movies anyway, why not get some points for doing it, right?)



I like learning about other cultures and how they raise their children (plus how they give birth without massive amounts of epidural...that looks painful! SERIOUSLY!) so I like how this movie tracks four very diffe3rent babies from four different parts of the world and we get to see their births and their early development. Working in a daycare center taught me that babies are weird little creatures (amazing, but weird!) and I have lots of stories. This movie looks like it would give me even more insight into how babies are born ans raised around the world (even the baby from the USA is from San Francisco and I'm sure his parents will raise him differently than my working class mother from the Midwest did).

Look at this baby!



Ponijao lives in Namibia with her family, including her parents and eight older brothers and sisters. Ponijao’s family is part of the Himba tribe, and lives in a small village with other families, following traditions including speaking their own (Himba) language. The men in the Himba tribe are generally off looking after the cattle and searching for grass, so Ponijao is most often with her mother and other female relatives; she plays, eats, and is bathed through the traditional method of mixing concrete red ochre with oil. Ponijao’s favorite things to do are dance and play with other children in the tribe.



Isn't she cute? And I totally used to do that thing they're doing in that first photo (peeking at the world upside down through my legs like that) back when I was little enough that it didn't make me pull a hamstring or something to stretch like that. Even babies from very different cultures have similar experiences.

Look at this photo!



Hi Mommy!

*iz ded of cute*

Here are some pictures of the other babies featured in the film:



Bayar from Bayanchandmani, Mongolia



Hattie from San Francisco, California



Mari from Tokyo, Japan



And here's another picture of Ponijao from Opuwo, Namibia, because she's just that cute!

Here's a theatrical poster for the movie and some more information about it:



The adventure of a lifetime begins…
Directed by award-winning filmmaker Thomas Balmès, from an original idea by producer Alain Chabat, Babies simultaneously follows four babies around the world – from birth to first steps. The children are, respectively, in order of on-screen introduction: Ponijao, who lives with her family near Opuwo, Namibia; Bayarjargal, who resides with his family in Mongolia, near Bayanchandmani; Mari, who lives with her family in Tokyo, Japan; and Hattie, who resides with her family in the United States, in San Francisco.

Re-defining the nonfiction art form, Babies joyfully captures on film the earliest stages of the journey of humanity that are at once unique and universal to us all.

A Focus Features presentation of a Chez Wam/StudioCanal co-production with the participation of Canal +. Babies. Executive Producers, TBC Productions, Chez Wam. Original Idea, Alain Chabat. Adapted by Thomas Balmès. Edited by Craig McKay, A.C.E., Reynald Bertrand. Produced by Alain Chabat, Amandine Billot, Christine Rouxel. Music by Bruno Coulais. Directed by Thomas Balmès. A Focus Features Release.

In theatres Mother's Day Weekend, May 7th.

Everyone should check out these links and then come with me to see the movie when it opens! It's a surefire way to inflame your already severe case of baby rabies!

P.S. Your Cat is Dead! (March 15, 2010)

This movie is based on a book that I read YEARS ago (like, I was 13 I think) and thus I don't remember the book enough to be as pissed off about the movie as lots of other people seem to be. I do remember that it was different from the movie, but the movie was a lot of fun, so I'm glad I have a foggy enough memory of the book to be able to enjoy the movie I saw instead of wishing it were something else.

This movie follows a down-on-his-luck actor through the events of the worst night of his life. He lives in an apartment everyone describes as a dump (though I thought it looked pretty nice myself) his can is in the hospital (as you can imagine from the title, it dies) his girlfriend left him and he's going to be alone on New Year's eve. A burglar has stolen from him several times over the past month or so, and when the movie opens, the same burglar breaks in, attempting to rob him again (bad timing, man). He winds up trapped in the apartment, and when our hero discovers the burglar, he goes berserk and decides to get revenge.

This movie has a sense of humor that I appreciate. It's a black comedy that's funny and mean-spirited in spades. I remember the book was moreso, but the movie keeps me entertained. The performances are a little rocky at times (some of the dialogue is a little weird, and I think ti probably worked better in the play...that's right, this was a play, too) but other than that, I had a lot of fun with this movie. It makes me want to read the book again just to remember what I'm missing.

A Time to Kill (March 15, 2010)

I read John Grisham's original novel "A Time to Kill" when I was a teenager and thought this movie would tone it down. The movie doesn't, though. It doesn't pull many punches, and now that I'm old and decrepit, I can even see better how the ending of this movie packs a greater emotional punch than the ending of the book (which drags on and on and ON forever and doesn't know how to wrap up or when to shut up). Movie adaptations are usually worse than the original books, but this is one case where I would argue that the movie is actually better than the original book (and I think all of John Grisham's movies are better than his books...I like them, but he doesn't know how to say what he wants to say and he gets in his own way too much...I like the movies better because they sum things up and get to the point a lot faster than his books do).

This movie is a harrowing story. In the beginning, a ten year old little girl is repeatedly raped by two racist Neanderthals, and when their attempt to kill her fails, they are eventually arrested and brought to trial. Her father hears that they might get a light sentence and he snaps and guns them down in the courthouse (I'd make a joke about how you don't fuck with Samuel L. Jackson, but it hardly seems appropriate given the circumstances). He is arrested and put on trial for their murder, and a young attorney has to represent him and try to see if a black man accused of killing two white men in the south can get a fair trial (HA, I say HA, even today, almost 20 years after this book was published). As you can imagine, the movie isn't a laff riot, and things get pretty grim and racist and icky and they make me want to turn off the TV. The movie at least TRIES to have an uplifting message, whereas the book is pretty bleak and hopeless. This movie is worth seeing for the summation speech alone (the argument that the defense attorney gives before the jury begins deliberations at the end of the trial).

This movie is hard to watch. You should watch it anyway.

I Can Do Bad All By Myself

Let us continue our trek through the land of movies I love that everyone else hates (which would be just about every movie I love, come to think of it) with a stop in Tyler Perry land. People hate Tyler Perry. They hate him. they drag him into discussions thaT have nothing to do with him just so they can bash him. I have seen interviews with him and I honestly don't get what all the hate is about. Is he arrogant? He might be, I don't know te man (and neither do any of you) but lots of people are arrogant and Hollywood loves them. Does he portray stereotypes in his movies? I don't know that either. I can't tell you why people seem to hate him, but I can tell you why I like him.

He makes movies I can relate to. I grew up in a family where the concept of "extended family" was as important to us as it is to the characters in this movie (I spent many months living with aunts, so I can relate to the kids in this movie). I went to churches like this, I grew up with this music, and I know a lot of people like this. All the people I'm talking about here are white. Someone told me that only black people like Tyler Perry's movies, and it's only the self-hating black people too, because they buy into the stereotypes he portrays (and that's one of the nicer comments I've heard). I can tell you I can relate to every word of this script, and I'm not black. I don't get it. I watch this movie, and I see a woman (April) who lives in a house she inherited and puts up with an abusive married boyfriend because she thinks that's all she can get out of life. We accept the love we think we deserve, right? I relate to April. I hear her say things that I've thought myself. I know what she's going through because I went through a lot of it, and the song "I Can Do Bad All By Myself" resonates with me because I read the lyrics and feel like it could be about me. When April finally decides to turn her life around and give love a chance and accept the love offered to her, I relate because it gives me hope that the same thing can happen for me someday. Whatever else this movie is, it's a movie that believes what it's saying. It believes in the concept of redemption, and I love it for that.

I said all this stuff in my original review of the movie but it bears repeating. I love it. Not everyone does, but I do, and that doesn't make me stupid and it doesn't make me a bad person.

Notting Hill

Hugh Grant became famous playing these kind of "bumbling fool" roles, and I have to tell you, I like his newer roles where he plays an asshole a lot more. the thing that works about this movie isn't Hugh Grant's performance as a bumbling fool, or Julia Roberts as the ice princess famous star who awkwardly tiptoes through every scene as she finds herself mysteriously falling for a patently unfamous bookstore owner, but the ensemble cast of weird friends who populate this universe. The "supporting cast" rally behind their friend as he goes through life, mourning his lack of luck in the love department, they support him when he decides not to complicate his life by getting involved with a star, and they rally together to help him out when he changes his mind and makes a last-ditch effort to win her back. I love the supporting cast of this movie, and I like what it has to say about love (it shows up in strange and annoying places, often thwarting our best-laid plans) and so I love this movie, as cliched as it might be. It has heart and soul that other movies with similar plots only wish they could have.

Win a Date with Tad Hamilton

This movie is NOT as bad as people make it out to be. Sure it's a cheesy throwaway comedy, but so what? I don't get the hate associated with this movie. I can think of far worse ways to spend 2 hours.

A small town girl wins a date with a big star. He thinks this will help his image. He ends up falling for her. She has a local guy who's liked her for years but he's been an emotionally immature idiot and kept it to himself. He gets jealous when the big star starts coming around town showing attention to her. It's not the most original or the most creative plot in the world, but it works for the movie. I love Kate Bosworth, so I enjoy seeing her in this movie. Like I said, it's nothing to write home about, but it's a fun little movie.

2010 Academy Awards

8:32 - Hey, it's Neil Patrick Harris. Time for a musical number. "No One Wants to Do It Alone." Is it just me or do the Oscars look smaller this year? It looks like they're in a small theater with only a couple hundred people sitting there. I think the camera is filming that way on purpose to make things seem more "intimate."

8:34 - Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin are lowered from the ceiling on a golden glittery swing. Big production, let me tell you.

8:35 - Making fun of Meryl Streep for having the most nominations ("or as I like to say it, most losses.")

8:36 - Noting differences in voting this year. Best Picture has 10 nominees this year ("when we learned that the Best Picture nominees had doubled this year, everyone in Hollywood thought the same thing...what is five times two?")

8:39 - Praising Mo'Nique's performance. She did a spectacular job freaking me the fuck out in "Precious." Steve Martin is reminded that the Academy doesn't often nominate stand-up comedians.

8:40 - donning 3D glasses to stare at James Cameron. Soon come a flock of floating CGI tree spirits across the screen (Steve Martin quickly dispatches them with some Off...now that was funny).

8:41 - Some "ex" jokes for Kathryn Bigelow and James Cameron (they used to be married, for anyone who didn't know).

8:42 - "In Inglorious Basterds, Christoph Waltz plays a Nazi obsessed with finding Jews...well Christoph," *gestures toward audience* "Here you are...the motherlode." Admit it, you laughed.

8:43 - Is it just me or does George Cloony look PISSED? He doesn't seem to like them making fun of him so much on the stage (seriously, he looks like he wants to stab them in the face).

8:44 - The nominees for best supporting actor. Last year there were no film clips showcasing the movies. Big mistake. This year, the film clips are back (and the peasants rejoiced).

8:45 - They really make me want to see "Invictus." That alone is a feat. See? THIS is why you show movies clips, academy. It piques interest by condensing the film to its best moments.

8:47 - Fuck, Stanley Tucci is creepy as hell. I want to see "The Lovely Bones" now.

8:47b - Christoph Waltz is SO going to win this.

8:48 - Yep, I thought so. Christoph Waltz won. Penelope Cruz isn't much for bringing suspense. She didn't even speak slowly when she opened the envelope containing the winner's name, she says "AndthewinnerisChristophWaltz." Ok, Speed Racer.

8:49 - What's with the fucking "Knot's Landing" music when everyone is walking offstage, academy? I'll pause here for all you youngins to Google "Knot's Landing."

8:50 - Montage of "The Blindside." Damn I want to see this movie. I remember what it was like when I got my first bed, so when I hear that line from the movie, I can totally relate.

8:52 - First commercial break and we've only handed out one award. I thought the broadcast was going to be SHORTER this year? FFS academy. Think of the old people who have to sit up late and liveblog this thing.

8:55 - Cameron Diaz and Steve Carell. Cameron Diaz usually sounds more conversational, but she's stumbling all over herself. Apparently the teleprompter was on the fritz.

8:57 - All the animated stars of the best animated feature film nominees sit down for interviews. This was actually pretty funny. Well done, academy.

8:58 - Of course "Up" wins. So far things are pretty predictable. I'm not knocking it, I loved "Up," but still, it would be nice to get a surprise here at some point in the night.

8:59 - That acceptance speech was adorable.

9:00 - Amanda Seyfrid and Miley Cyrus take the stage. The screen melts from too much HOTT on one stage. Ok, that didn't really happen, but it COULD have.

9:01 - Miley Cyrus fumbles in her speech and admits she's nervous. I love her.

9:02 - Wow, "The Princess and the Frog" has some great music. I can't wait for my pre-ordered DVD to come!

9:03 - "The Weary Kind" is actually a great song. I really want to see "Crazy Heart" now.

9:04 - And "The Weary Kind" wins. Awesome job, guys. I'm tearing up as the song plays while they're walking to the stage.

9:05 - Chris Pine introduces the montage for "District 9." When I saw the trailers for this in theaters, I never thought it would be nominated for an academy award, let alone Best Picture. People can bitch all they want about how it's only in because there are 10 nominees, I'm still grateful that as a horror fan, I feel represented in the awards this year.

9:06 - 36 minutes in, second commercial break, and we've only given out two awards. This is going to be a long night. *dies*

9:11 - "The Academy Awards: the biggest night in Hollywood since last time." Alec Baldwin speaks the truth.

9:13 - Acting is "a collaboration between handsome people and sickly little mole people." HA, this is hilarious.

9:14 - This "Best original Screenplay montage is annoying. Do we really need someone to read the screenplay over the scene? I get what you're doing, trying to show the words contributing to the creation of the movie, but ugh.

9:15 - "The Hurt Locker" wins. I predict this one will win a lot of awards tonight.

9:16 - Mark Boal kind of looks like Keanu Reeves, but he's more articulate. I love when he says "Kathryn Bigelow, this belongs to you" even though he won for his writing. And he thanks the troops, and his father, who recently died. This was a sweet speech. He packed a lot of heart into two minutes.

9:18 - Matthew Broderick and Molly Ringwald take the stage to honor John Hujghes. I grew up with Ferris Bueller, as well as the rest of these movies, helped shape my childhood years, so the coming montage was great for me. I forgot how many John hughes movies I watched as a kid and a teen.

9:20 - "It's just unavoidable. When you grow up, your heart dies." What a great line.

9:21 - "Life movies pretty fast. you don't stop and slow down every once in awhile, you might miss it." Another great line. John Hughes was a genius.

9:23 - John Hughes' family stands up in the audience for a standing ovation. This speech is too sad.

9:23b - The "Up" montage reminds me what a great movie this is. Cue the waterworks.

9:27 - Carey Mulligan and Zoe Saldana take the stage to honor the best animated short film of the year. They're explaining why it's important to honor short films. The filmmakers in the following montage make a good case. I'll admit, sometimes I think of this as "one of the boring filler awards" but I'm sure it's important to the people who win. Plus they're right, some of my favorite filmmakers made short films before they went on to make my favorite movies.

9:31 - "Logorama" actually looks pretty cool.

9:31b - And lo and behold, it wins! I have to check it out now.

9:32 - This speech is great. "I have to thank the one-thousand unofficial sponsors of this film." Way to snark about all the logos you ganked to make your cartoon. I like this guy.

9:33 - The nominees for "Best Documentary Short."

9:34 - The guy who wins for "Music by Prudence" runs to the stage holding his hands over his face...Roger Ross Williams is obviously excited, and it's really sweet. I'm glad he won.

9:35 - They get yanked off the stage when they're not done with their speech. Classy, academy.

9:36 - The nominees for best live-action short. Let's hope no one gets kicked off the stage this time.

9:36b - "The New Tenants" wins. The speech is pretty funny. John Baron says he doesn't know if he should dance, and Tivi Magnusson waves him off, like "pfft, stop it." that was a cute moment. too bad their speech gets cut short by the loud interrupting music. Jesus Academy, stop being such pricks tonight.

9:38 - Ben Stiller in full "avatar" makeup, mocking the alien language from the movie. "I am here to present the award for best makeup...the irony is that "Avatar" isn't even nominated...I should've just worn my Spock ears because Star Trek is actually nominated...I have two pairs from the original series, both signed by Leonard Nimoy. But that would have been too nerdy. This is much cooler."

9:41 - "Star Trek" wins for best makeup. One of the guys sneaks in a "Happy Anniversary baby!" before the music crushes them all.

9:43 - "A Serious Man" is introduced with a montage. You can tell this is a Cohen brothers movie. It's all weird and stuff. It's hard to compile clips from any of their movies into anything that makes sense.

9:48 - The best adapted screenplay nominees. More words appearing over scenes from the movie. This one is less awkward.

9:50 - Jeffrey Fletcher wins for "Precious." I'm glad. He did a good job turning that material into something powerful. I really need to watch this movie all the way through.

9:51 - Jeffrey Fletcher is going to make me cry. Again.

9:52 - Queen Latifah takes the stage to talk about the Governor's awards (lifetime achievement awards).

9:54 - "To the filmmakers who have the courage to take a chance, I tell you, keep taking chances." Roger Corman is awesome.

9:54b - The camera pans the crowd and finds Penelope Cruz looking very bored. Whoops.

9:55 - Best supporting actress nominees announced by Robin Williams.

9:56 - I want to marry Vera Farminga. And Penelope Cruz. And I kind of want to punch George Cloony for making Vera Farminga cry.

9:57 - I want to marry Maggie Gyllenhaal too. Peter Sarsgaard is a lucky man. And I want to punch Jeff Bridges for making Maggie Gyllenhaal cry.

9:59 - Damn, Mo'nique deserves this award.

9:59b - And she wins. I love you, Mo'nique. I teared up when she thanked her husband.

10:01 - Colin Firth introduces the montage for best picture nominee "An education." I want to see this movie now.

10:05 - Sigorney Weaver takes the stage to introduce the nominees for art direction. "Avatar" really deserves this. So does "The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus."

10:07 - "Avatar" Wins. I'm glad, too. The damn "Avatar" guy is making me cry too ("13 years ago I was told I had two years to live and I thought this dream of standing here would never happen"). Everyone is out to get me tonight.

10:09 - The award for best costume design. "He directed 'A Single Man' and she weighs a single pound." HAHAHA!

10:10 - "The Young Victora" wins. I didn't see that coming. Guess I'm not going to win that damn Oscar poll. Regardless, her costumes were beautiful and Sandy Powell really deserved this. I love it when she says "I already have two of these..." and then dedicates her award to the designers who aren't often recognized, those who work on independent movies and movies that don't get nominated for awards like this. She seems pretty classy.

10:12 - Charlize Theron introduces the montage for "Precious." And I'm crying again. I'm going to buy stock in Kleenex after tonight, dammit.

10:17 - Making fun of "Paranormal Activity." I actually laughed out loud.

10:18 - Honoring horror movies. I love it. This is my montage.

10:22 - Way to give away the end of the movie assholes.

10:22b - Why the hell is Zac Efron onstage? At least we get Morgan Freeman announcing the winners. His explanation of best sound editing is a good one. As a fan of war movies, "Black Hawk Down" taught me an appreciation of the art of sound editing.

10:24 - :"The Hurt Locker" wins. I love it when a good war movie wins this category. Paul N.J. Ottosan gives a stirring speech, too. He sounds genuinely appreciative.

10:26 - Isn't "sound mixing" a part of "sound editing"? Weird. Regardless, "The Hurt Locker" wins again and Paul N.J. Ottosan has to get back onstage again. He's so funny. "Again, thank you so much." These guys know how to give a short speech. I should get some pointers because I suck at this.

10:28 - More snarking James Cameron for his 3D tech knowledge.

10:29 - The "Inglorious Basterds" montage. They make this movie sound better than it was (sue me, I fell asleep).

10:34 - Sandra Bullock takes the stage. I love her dress, seriously. "The cinematographer is...usually the first person I befriend onset. Seriously. the conversation goes something like this: Dude, make me look good." That's what cinematographers do, really. Make everything look good.

10:35 - Avatar wins. I wonder if James Cameron and Kathryn Bigelow are keeping score?

10:37 - Demi Moore is here. Wow, her dress is gorgeous too. She's introducing the montage of those who've died this year ("God's hit list," as my friend Dani calls it).

10:38 - James Taylor is going to be performing the song live this year over the montage. Aww. I miss David Carradine. Dom DeLuise too.

10:39 - I forgot about Brittany Murphy. *tear*

10:40 - As predicted, Michael Jackson gets the most applause.

10:45 - Best original score nominees.

10:46 - There are going to be dancers dancing onstage to the music of the nominated movies? Really? That's kind of cool. Who came up with that idea?

10:47 - The League of Extraordinary Dancers looks kind of creepy honoring the score for "The Hurt Locker." It's a hard piece to dance to, though.

10:50 - The dance to the music from "Up" is even creepier. I wonder how long they rehearsed this dance?

10:50b - The music to "Avatar" was made for dancing.

10:52 - Finally getting to the list of nominees. And "Up" wins. Damn, that's a long stage. Michael Giacchino looks like he doesn't know where to walk. You need as guide dog to get around up there.

10:53 - "If you wanna be creative, get out there and do it, it's not a waste of time." Great speech Michael.

10:54 - Best visual effects nominees.

10:55 - "Avatar" wins. No big surprise.

10:56 - I love the acceptance speech. He thanks the people watching for supporting his movie and says "Just remember, the world we live in is just as amazing as the one we created for you." That was a cool thing to say.

10:57 - The best picture montage for "Up in the Air."

10:57 - George Cloony still looks pissed. Or bored. Or both.

11:01 - Matt Damon is taking the stage to present the award for best documentary feature.

11:02 - I want "The Cove" to win. Or "Food Inc."

11:03 - Or "Which Way Home."

11:04 - And "The Cove" takes it. Looks like a movie I need to see.

11:05 - Stop cutting people off with your loud music, academy. seriously. this is the last time I'm going to ask. It's classless.

11:05b - Tyler Perry says "they just said my name at the Oscars...I'd better enjoy it, 'cause it's probably never going to happen again." I love Tyler Perry.

11:07 - The nominees for best film editing.

11:07b - "The Hurt Locker" takes it. And the winners are husband and wife. they're so cute! I like their speech. Kudos to them for making an independent feature that took risks.

11:08 - "The Hurt Locker" gets its best picture montage.

11:14 - Best foreign language film...why is Quentin Tarantino onstage presenting? He speaks his own language, sure, but still...

11:17 - "The Secret in their Eyes" wins. Didn't see that one coming. Most people predicted "A Prophet" would win.

11:18 - I love his speech trying to get everything out before he gets kicked off stage.

11:19 - Kathy Bates announces the "Avatar" best picture montage.

11:23 - The best actor nominees get a montage. I know "A Single Man" won't win, but I really want to see it. Did I mention I love Colin Firth? I love Jeff Bridges though, too, and he gave a great performance in "Crazy Heart."

11:26 - George Cloony is smiling for the first time tonight while Vera Farminga is describing him.

11:29 - Tim Robbins describes Morgan Freeman: "I'll never forget what you said to me on the last day of working on "The Shawshank Redemption." You said 'Being a friend is getting the other person a cup of coffee. Could you do that for me, Ted? It Is Ted, right?'" I love Morgan Freeman.

11:32 - Finally we get to the actual award.

11:32b - Jeff Bridges wins it. We all knew that would happen, right? And he gets a standing ovation.

11:33 - He's shaking his Oscar at the sky thanking his mom and dad. Aww.

11:36 - They're not going to cut his speech, dammit. Let the man talk.

11:37 - Just so you know, we're taking a commercial break, and we have three more awards to hand out, and if they all get as long an introduction as Best Actor did, this show will be another hour long.

11:40 - Another long set of intros for the best actress nominees.

11:41 - Sandra Bullock is tearing up. I would be, too. Hell, I AM and they're not even talking about me.

11:44 - Gabourey Sidbe looks shocked that Oprah is announcing her from the stage. Aww, she's tearing up, too.

11:46 - Stanley Tucci is making Meryl Streep cry. Plus he's funny, saying he's going to petition the academy to cap the number of times a person can be nominated at 16, because it's selfish and unseemly for her to be so "greedy" with her nominations.

11:48 - There's that damn "Knot's Landing" music again. Or maybe it's "Dallas." Regardless, Sandra Bullock wins. Good for her. I've always loved her.

11:49 - "Did I really earn this or did I just wear you all down?" Seriously, I love you, Sandra.

11:51 - "I would like to thank what this film is about for me, which is the moms that take care of the babies and the children, no matter where they come from." And then she thanks her mom and makes me cry again for the zillionth time this night.

11:53 - Barbara Streisand takes the stage to announce the nominees for best director. I think Cameron is going to win, but I'd love it is Bigelow won, or Lee Daniels, because his movie was great. Or if Quentin Tarantino won, I'd love that because I've loved him for years, even if I didn't like this particular movie.

11:55 - Kathryn Bigelow wins. First time a woman has won best director. I'm really happy for her. She directed "Near Dark," which is one of my favorite movies, so it's great to see her talent finally rewarded.

11:57 - She dedicates her award to the women and men risking their lives in the military. Awesome.

11:58 - Ew, don't play "I am Woman" as she leaves the stage. Seriously, quit patting yourself on the back, academy. I'm glad she has a vagina, but she deserved this award because she's a great director, not because she has a vagina.

11:59 - "The Hurt Locker" wins best picture and half the audience takes the stage. It's always great when an indie wins, plus they upset the great giant James Cameron, plus she used to be married to James Cameron, so haha! This win is an upset. Not a total surprise, but I'm happy just the same.

12:01 - "Another dedication, to everyone around the world who wears a uniform...they're there for us, and we're there for them."

12:02 - "This show was so long that "Avatar" now takes place in the past." Well said, Steve Martin.

So not many surprises, but it was fun just the same. Thanks for spending the night with me.

The Show Must Go On

They really need to quit cutting people off with the interrupting music. They practically had to send security to drag the people from "Music by Prudence" off the stage. Very classy...NOT.

Pre-Oscar Buzz

8:24 PM - I don't care what anyone says, Taylor Lautner is WAY hotter than Robert Pattinson.

Pre-Oscar Buzz

This just in: Jennifer Lopez loved "Precious." My wimpy ass couldn't make it through more than half of that movie. I'll have to give it another chance sometime. Anything that affects me that much is worth another chance.

Liveblogging the 2010 Academy Awards

This space will soon contain a witty (or half-witty) running commentary chronicling the highlights of this year's Academy Awards broadcast. I know you're all quaking in your boots with excitement.